So relatable Ryan! If my 18 year old self could see me now, she’d be absolutely blown away with what I’ve accomplished and where I am today. But I still feel this constant tension of how I should keep moving forward, and if that means pivoting to do something riskier or keep on this path. Being 25 is HARD because there’s little clarity!
The idea is basically, especially for high-achievers, we are always evaluating ourselves from the 'GAP'. Basically, we set our goals, achieve them, and then we are setting something new and measuring our progress from this new starting point. Rather than, measuring ourselves from the 'GAIN'. Acknowledging how far we have come and looking backwards to exactly your point, 'my 18 year old self'.
Something I will continue to work and reflect on. Hench the name of my Substack, Present and Progressing. How do I balance my ambition with being satisfied and content in life. Taking it day by day.
Thanks for reading Hannah. Wishing you all the best. Hope you have a great day!
This whole piece really resonated with me. I never had words for it in my 20s and you articulated the feelings and thoughts so perfectly. I have iterations of some of these ideas scattered in my articles as well so I am quite literally right there with you. Keep writing!
Thank you so much for reading. Appreciate you sharing your thoughts and letting me know you had the same feelings. This is why I love writing my thoughts for people. Sometimes it is hard to find people in your day to day that can truly understand what you're feeling. Looking forward to writing more and keeping up with your writing as well! :) I hope you have a great day!
Ryan, This really struck me — especially the part about outgrowing the old question of ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ It put words to something I’ve been feeling but couldn’t quite explain. It’s not that I’m lost, it’s that the question itself has changed. Thank you for articulating it so clearly.
Good golly, are we twins, Ryan? I read this and felt like we’re definitely cut from the same cloth. I know it’s a bit of a cliche to say “this resonated” but it reeeeally did. A friend of mine sent me a podcast episode (a while ago) that explores some of this in an interesting way. If I find the ep, I’ll send it to you
Would love to listen if you find it! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. Even though these are struggles we deal with, it’s great to know that there are people out there that relate.
Hey Ashley! Thank you so much for reading and giving your insights. Read through your article, very good timing and relatable. Just subscribed to your page and following along now. I invite you to do the same if my writing speaks to you.
Looking forward to reading more of your work and potentially collaborating in the future. Hope you have a great rest of your day!! 🙌🏻☀️
Thank you for such an enjoyable read! I especially resonate with 1,3,4 and 9. My husband and I have been walking through this process for the past few months, wrestling with all the things we COULD do but having such a hard time actually choosing one and then commiting to it. We often get stuck not doing anything because it "feels" safer in the moment but then you are not moving forward, or growing, or experiencing life to its full potential. Definitely a lot of things to think about and it is not an easy process to figure out, certainly not one you can learn through reading a lot of books and watching endless YouTube videos. At some point you just have to choose one option and start moving forward and the rest will follow.
Glad this article resonated with you. Yeah, every option will have pros and cons, and no choice will ever be perfect. As you said, at some point, you just have to pick one and make the best with what you choose.
Thank you so much for reading and contributing to the conversation. I hope you have a great day! 🙌🏻😁
"The hard truth? Sometimes, what I need most is stillness: time to reflect, reset, and just be. But that’s also what feels hardest. I’m used to proving my value through output. So when there’s no checklist to conquer or progress to track, I start questioning my worth. It’s not that I don’t believe in rest, it’s just that I don’t always know how to do it without guilt."
This is something I've been learning to deal with. I'm that guy that wants to do it all at once and quick as possible. I'm not lazy, I'm actually over ambitious. But learning how to take a nap in the afternoon, watching a movie or two on the weekends it's actually refreshing but quite difficult for me at the same time.
I'm only 23 and most of what you wrote feels like you're describing my life. Thank you for sharing it, and I hope it hits a lot of youngsters like us. Many need to listen to this.
Agreed man. Everything in moderation. Glad this resonated with you! I'm very bullish on our generation, just need to make sure that our values and intentions are in the right place. Keep striving and learning my friend!
Appreciate this recommendation. Haven't read yet, but will put on the list. Will let you know it goes--maybe I'll write an article about it too! Hope you have a great day my friend.
I felt so seen through your words in this piece. Thank you for writing about the struggles many of us Type A people face in our 20s. It was very reassuring reading this.
So relatable Ryan! If my 18 year old self could see me now, she’d be absolutely blown away with what I’ve accomplished and where I am today. But I still feel this constant tension of how I should keep moving forward, and if that means pivoting to do something riskier or keep on this path. Being 25 is HARD because there’s little clarity!
100%. I just started reading 'The Gap and the Gain' this week: https://www.amazon.com/Gap-Gain-Achievers-Happiness-Confidence/dp/1401964362
The idea is basically, especially for high-achievers, we are always evaluating ourselves from the 'GAP'. Basically, we set our goals, achieve them, and then we are setting something new and measuring our progress from this new starting point. Rather than, measuring ourselves from the 'GAIN'. Acknowledging how far we have come and looking backwards to exactly your point, 'my 18 year old self'.
Something I will continue to work and reflect on. Hench the name of my Substack, Present and Progressing. How do I balance my ambition with being satisfied and content in life. Taking it day by day.
Thanks for reading Hannah. Wishing you all the best. Hope you have a great day!
Thank you for recommending this book. It sounds like a great read!
This whole piece really resonated with me. I never had words for it in my 20s and you articulated the feelings and thoughts so perfectly. I have iterations of some of these ideas scattered in my articles as well so I am quite literally right there with you. Keep writing!
Thank you so much for reading. Appreciate you sharing your thoughts and letting me know you had the same feelings. This is why I love writing my thoughts for people. Sometimes it is hard to find people in your day to day that can truly understand what you're feeling. Looking forward to writing more and keeping up with your writing as well! :) I hope you have a great day!
Thanks, Ryan. Same to you!
Ryan, This really struck me — especially the part about outgrowing the old question of ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ It put words to something I’ve been feeling but couldn’t quite explain. It’s not that I’m lost, it’s that the question itself has changed. Thank you for articulating it so clearly.
Reading someone's writing about 'not knowing' is refreshing. Very rare and very real, . .
Appreciate it Mike. Means a lot and that’s exactly my goal with this page
Good golly, are we twins, Ryan? I read this and felt like we’re definitely cut from the same cloth. I know it’s a bit of a cliche to say “this resonated” but it reeeeally did. A friend of mine sent me a podcast episode (a while ago) that explores some of this in an interesting way. If I find the ep, I’ll send it to you
Would love to listen if you find it! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. Even though these are struggles we deal with, it’s great to know that there are people out there that relate.
Appreciate you. Hope you have a great day!
I think everything you touched on in your piece is very human - that’s why it’s so relatable.
I found the podcast ep. It’s basically about a comedian who’s continually wondered if he should have been a doctor, so he meets with a regret researcher to figure out his next move https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/proxy-with-yowei-shaw/id1746433334?i=1000706486584
I was going through somewhat of a career crisis a few months ago and my friend sent it to me. It was interesting.
Thanks for sharing!! 😁
I 100% felt all of this when going through my “quarter life crisis” - I recently posted some thoughts from the other side: https://open.substack.com/pub/ashleyeure/p/6-tips-for-navigating-transition?r=18p8kf&utm_medium=ios
Hey Ashley! Thank you so much for reading and giving your insights. Read through your article, very good timing and relatable. Just subscribed to your page and following along now. I invite you to do the same if my writing speaks to you.
Looking forward to reading more of your work and potentially collaborating in the future. Hope you have a great rest of your day!! 🙌🏻☀️
Thank you for such an enjoyable read! I especially resonate with 1,3,4 and 9. My husband and I have been walking through this process for the past few months, wrestling with all the things we COULD do but having such a hard time actually choosing one and then commiting to it. We often get stuck not doing anything because it "feels" safer in the moment but then you are not moving forward, or growing, or experiencing life to its full potential. Definitely a lot of things to think about and it is not an easy process to figure out, certainly not one you can learn through reading a lot of books and watching endless YouTube videos. At some point you just have to choose one option and start moving forward and the rest will follow.
Glad this article resonated with you. Yeah, every option will have pros and cons, and no choice will ever be perfect. As you said, at some point, you just have to pick one and make the best with what you choose.
Thank you so much for reading and contributing to the conversation. I hope you have a great day! 🙌🏻😁
"The hard truth? Sometimes, what I need most is stillness: time to reflect, reset, and just be. But that’s also what feels hardest. I’m used to proving my value through output. So when there’s no checklist to conquer or progress to track, I start questioning my worth. It’s not that I don’t believe in rest, it’s just that I don’t always know how to do it without guilt."
This is something I've been learning to deal with. I'm that guy that wants to do it all at once and quick as possible. I'm not lazy, I'm actually over ambitious. But learning how to take a nap in the afternoon, watching a movie or two on the weekends it's actually refreshing but quite difficult for me at the same time.
I'm only 23 and most of what you wrote feels like you're describing my life. Thank you for sharing it, and I hope it hits a lot of youngsters like us. Many need to listen to this.
Agreed man. Everything in moderation. Glad this resonated with you! I'm very bullish on our generation, just need to make sure that our values and intentions are in the right place. Keep striving and learning my friend!
All POINTS 🙌 I wonder how you write all my mind boggling points in your writing ✨🙌
Glad this resonated with you! Sounds like we have some similar struggles, but this is apart of the process! :)
A book that could be interesting for you: The Paradox of Choice written by Barry Schwartz :)
Appreciate this recommendation. Haven't read yet, but will put on the list. Will let you know it goes--maybe I'll write an article about it too! Hope you have a great day my friend.
I felt so seen through your words in this piece. Thank you for writing about the struggles many of us Type A people face in our 20s. It was very reassuring reading this.